8 things I’m thankful for this 2008

1.    My second-hand Mac.
2.    The LCD television I won in a raffle contest.
3.    My family.
4.    Lessons on humility and trust. They were oftentimes learned in difficult, pushed-against-the-wall kind of situations. I’m still learning up to now.
5.    Another year in law school. I’m not quite sure how I was able to get past through certain subjects, but what I know is that it isn’t because of anything in me. It was purely grace.
6.    God’s patience and mercy. I’m stubborn and hardheaded that it would not be a surprise if someone gives up on me. God does not. And what a comfort it is.
7.    My local church. For how God used it to edify, rebuke, teach, and encourage me in my walk.
8.    Christ. That He should come to save wretched sinners like me when He is under no obligation to do so leaves me in awe.

From a fishbowlful of names

In his blog several weeks ago, Tim Challies has written about how he hasn’t won anything in his life. He asked whether his readers have it differently, and I was planning on giving him a reply that says something like, “Not really, Mr. Challies.” This is a fairly accurate statement, at least insofar as it concerns raffle draws, because while I could point to certain memories of going up the stage to receive this and that prize, I could only remember two of them.

During one fiesta celebration in our village, my name got picked by Ma’am Valme from a tambiolo. She is a slim, middle-aged lady with a disposition of a preschool teacher and a charm of a politician. Clad in my old and dirty pair of rubber slippers, ill-fitted shirt and worn-out pants, I went up the stage to receive my reward. Just as I was about to leave, she thrust the microphone to me, and declared that I should say a few words. My voice was shaky and my pauses frequent as I tried hard to conjure an impromptu, Oscars-like speech. My brother was savoring the scene, and was laughing so hard at my expense.

My name also got picked during our church’s Family day celebrations this December. I became a recipient of an alarm clock and two sets of pens that I need. A lot of gifts were given that day that it seemed all you had to do to win anything was to be present.

However, beginning this December 13, I would be able to remember three. Here’s an account of how I won the third time:

After Tax 2 class, my classmates and I decided to eat at a nearby canteen. To be able to go there, we passed through the main entrance of the college. Tables were set and several people were coming in for a Christmas party that we had not been invited to and that we had no intention of attending. But this lady stopped us, and directed us to occupy an empty table. We were delighted. Free meals are always something to be delighted about.

Then, we were handed tickets, one for each of us. We obediently filled it out with our names. Mine bore the number 185. We were told the tickets were for the raffle draw. They were giving out, among others, two 19-inches Phillips LCD televisions. My classmates all wanted to win. I was the most cavalier. I didn’t want to come in front lest I be made to conjure an impromptu, Oscars-like speech again.

Then the guy picking out the winners announced my name. I won the television. And there was no need for the speech.

I gave the television to my parents when I came to the province for the Christmas break. Our old one is very old, indeed. My parents bought it when I was 8. I’m 23 now. When I told them my name got picked in a raffle draw, my mother thought I was joking. When she realized I was not, she exclaimed, “An unexpected blessing from the Lord.”

I agree with her. It is an unexpected blessing, indeed. It is a blessing because it is undeserved. I didn’t do anything good to merit it—I didn’t do anything at all except, perhaps, write my name on the ticket. It is unexpected because I came to school only to attend classes. I was not told there was going to have a party downstairs. I was not told someone would hand us tickets to fill-out. I was not told my name would be called. And it was from the Lord. I believe that God is in control of everything, even in the picking of a name from a fishbowlful of names.

That I may always have a sense

I’m grateful that today is a holiday, so instead of going to school very early in the morning, I got to spend a lot of time reading my Bible, and a good book called, Why I am a Christian, written by John Stott.

Earlier, I meditated on Acts 17: 26-27, and was reminded of God’s sovereignty. Although the immediate context speaks of God’s control over the length of our lives and the places of our birth, I think the verses could be extended to include God’s sovereignty over everything. (Anyway, the Bible is full of instances showing that God is indeed in control of everything—the experiences of Job, for example). That someone wiser, holier, more loving and more powerful than I am is in control of everything brings me much comfort, especially during times when I struggle with sin.

John Stott’s book is likewise an encouragement as it points the reader constantly back to Christ. I haven’t finished the book yet, but let me share one very good quote. On the question of why God does not simply forgive us without the necessity of the cross, Stott says:

It is when we begin to see the gravity of sin and the majesty of God that our questions change. No longer do we ask why God finds it difficult to forgive sins, but how he finds it possible.

That I may always have a sense of God’s greatness and sin’s utter horribleness!

From Nanay

At midnight, I got this text message from my mother who was attending an awarding ceremony in some posh hotel:

Praise God, I’m the most outstanding chapter president [of the Philippine Dental Association] in Mindanao.”

Wow, Praise God, indeed.

Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

Yesterday, I went to the Law Christian Fellowship meeting. I had wanted to go for the longest time. But, for the longest time too, my class schedule wouldn’t allow me. I enjoyed every minute that I wasn’t scouring over my books or marking any of my cases. It was refreshing just to be sitting there, and looking into the eyes of five or six people who have a deep love for the Lord. BJ talked about Ezekiel, particularly that chapter on the Valley of the Dry Bones. It made all of us remember how law school can sap us dry to the bones, and rip all of our flesh and sinews apart. More than that, it made all of us remember that God is able to restore the dead–and the dying–back to life.

Yesterday, I went to see Transformers. I like the movie a lot because, as one classmate put it, “It’s a popcorn flick, and it doesn’t pretend to be anything other than a popcorn flick.” I watched with two of my friends, and in the middle of the movie, epiphany struck me in the same way it did the boy in James Joyce’s “Araby”: These robots used to grace the cover of my notebooks in second grade!

Today, I woke up knowing that I needed to be reminded of my own weaknesses, of my propensity to sin and disobey God; so that in all these, He could be my strength. I read Romans 8, and the first verse is so powerful it could propel a badly beaten and exhausted soldier back in the thick of battle : “There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Indeed, it is a joy to know that I can wake up everyday, and nothing in the world can ever change my position in Christ.

Today, I went to church for the second part of the Estudyante Blues of the Youth Fellowship of my church. Last Saturday, Kuya Oscar talked about Christians being the salt and light of the world (by the way, I’ve written something on this subject several months ago here). This afternoon, Kuya Lito talked about Christian fellowship–or koinonia in Greek. I pray that God would work wonders in the lives of those who went to the activity.

Tomorrow? Well, it is yet another day which will have worries of its own. But praise be to God whose compassions are new every morning.

Booking Mishaps

I come from a place almost two thousand kilometers away from Manila. With the exorbitant cost of air fares, the obvious torture of bus rides, and the apparent sluggishness of boats, I usually get to go home to Koronadal, South Cotabato only once in a year–that is, only during the Christmas break.

Because of my parents’ constant reminder, I began making reservations early this week at the Cebu Pacific (which has the cheapest rates available) for my brother and me. I know the break is still some time in the future, but December is a busy month for airline companies; so the prudent thing to do is to book flights the earliest possible time. I don’t want to sleep in the airport hoping that someone will miss his trip, so I could take it in his stead–which was the fate of my friend who, a couple of years ago, made a decision to go home to the province only on the the second week of December, during which time the flights were already fully-booked.

This afternoon, I went to a travel agency in SM North to purchase the tickets. I was greeted by a lady who asked me to fill out some bits of information on a piece of paper . As I was scribbling down the curves and the loops of my name, the lady was phoning the airline company to confirm the reservations I made. I heard her mutter, “Ralph Vincent…uh-huh…bound for General Santos…on December 26.”

I was horrified. I made reservations for the 16th, not the 26th.

“Miss, 16 po ‘yung ni-reserve ko hindi 26,” I quickly butted-in. The lady patiently relayed my clarifications to the person on the other line. After a few minutes, she got back to me: “Sir, 26 po talaga ‘yung naka-reserve.”

I was hoping the problem would be sorted out immediately, and that there would still be flights available on that day. Praise God because there were! And the good this is, the price is a couple of hundreds lower than the flight which was erroneously scheduled on the 26th.

So there. With the problem solved, and the tickets paid out, I walked towards the jeepney stop, all the while thinking how good and in control God is even in situations such as that. I was filled with joy, because God has made my heart sensitive even to these little things. I also thank Him for the financial provisions. Surely, the decrease in the cost of the ticket is most welcome, especially now that it is enrollment period.

Going home, indeed, creates in me pangs of excitement. But before that, there will be mountains of cases to read, stressful recitations to prepare for, and teachers of different breeds to get used to. It is my earnest prayer that God in His mercy and grace would sustain me physically, mentally, and most of all, spititually.

I can’t wait for Christmas.

Breaktime Chronology

Between now and my last post, a lot of things have happened. Here they are in chronological order:

1. Confirmation of Intention to Enroll at the College of Law. Right after graduation, my parents told me to arrange everything at Malcolm Hall. I rushed there early in the morning to confirm, but they told me to do it in writing. I immediately went to my ex-dorm in my ex-room, where I found my ex-roommate (which, by the way, happens to be my brother), and typed something like this in my ex-computer:

Dear so and so,I am pleased to receive the letter informing me of my admission at the College of Law. I am now making known my intention to enroll.

Writing this took me a long time.

2. Trip to Bacolod. The Wednesday after I submitted my letter, my family and I (excluding Lance, my ex-roomate/brother; but including RR, my cousin) boarded Superferry 17, where we endured Sharon Cuneta's "Trip Kita" song being played repeatedly over the audio system of the ship. One day later, we were in Bacolod; and after a few hours and some fifty or so kilometers, we found ourselves in Kabankalan eating sugpo, sisi, alimango, and a whole lot more without spoiling our appetite by thinking of the prices.

Everything was free courtesy of my mother's best friend, Tita Mimi.

3. Trip to South Cotabato. After three days and two nights in Kabankalan, we headed to Ilo-ilo and waited for Superferry 15 to bring us home. The ship was big but a little bit quiet; we didn't get to hear the "Trip Kita" song anymore. The weather, by the way, was very beautiful.

4. Trip to Polomolok. I visited my grandmother in the nearby town of Polomolok, and stayed there for three nights. I had a fun time catching up with my relatives' busy lives.

I thank God for everything. This break, just like everything else in my life, is an undeserved gift from Him.

Why I Don’t Believe in Luck

This stretch of the academic calendar in U.P. consists mainly of final exams, term papers, and of course, theses defense. During these times, it is not a surprise to hear a torrent of “good lucks” hurled everywhere like rain falling on arid land (as if this phrase can actually catapult one’s grade from zero to a hundred).

But I don’t believe in luck. Nor in chance. Nor in the mere randomness of things. I believe that God is in control of all things at all times. In His independence and self-existence, He can do anything that pleases Him (Psalm 115:3). He is sovereign over all people, nations, and even nature.

The sovereignty of God then necessarily eliminates the idea of luck.

Last Friday, we defended our thesis before a distinguished panel. During our preparation, several people bid us good luck; while others said we didn’t need it. (The second clause here is deceiving, because it is premised on what we can do. In other words, they believe we could pull off a good show because we are so brilliant. However, left to our own, we are and can do nothing. What we have comes from Him alone.)

Indeed, we were able to go through with the defense, and come out of it a little bit unscathed. But it is not because of luck. It is because of grace. Praise be to the God who is sovereign in all things!

Thesis Stuff

“Ralph, Dr. Castro wants to see us at four p.m.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know. Thesis stuff, probably.”
“Really?”
“I received her text message. It seems urgent—no smileys and all”
“Oh, okay. I’ll be there” Oh no, what could that be?

***

I cannot help but praise God for His grace. Our thesis adviser gave us back the copy of our work complete with the corrections and suggestions of our critic. There are minor areas to work on—mostly on the mechanics—so we don’t have to do a total overhaul of our framework or our discussions.

We are actually working on Child Language Research, and our thesis primarily seeks to analyze how children initiate conversation with different conversation partners such as their peer, their teacher or a complete stranger. We are working under the assumption that though it is admittedly difficult to begin a conversation, children are able to resolve this dilemma. We are interested then in the initiation devices that they use (which are really like tools to a carpenter) and in the functions that these devices serve.

There is no doubt that it is God who went before and after us as we worked on our research. He was the one who kept us awake and alert as we labored into the night. It was He who supplied us with the ideas as well as the logistics and finances. It was He who moved in the hearts of everyone involved in the research—the principal of the school, the parents of the subjects, the grade school pupils and the guidance counselor. Indeed, apart from Him we could have done nothing.

We are scheduled to defend on March 24, and I trust and pray that God’s grace would continue to abound. Soli Deo Gloria!